Hello and welcome to LearnDoBecome Radio! I’m April Perry, and here at LearnDoBecome, we create simple systems so we, as a community, can do what matters most.
While a lot of what we cover is about “organization,” the why behind that is that we want to architect lives of excellence.
Our personal values around excellence include connecting with our Higher Power, building financial stability, investing in mental and physical wellness, creating calm, uplifting environments, building strong family relationships, and pursuing our purpose. Those are the 6 areas of focus in our ARISE community, as well!
A few months ago, I invited my personal coach, Mike Christensen, who I also spoke about in episode 55 of this podcast, to work with our ARISE community and share the method that he has taught me regarding cognitive behavioral therapy. It was such a great conversation, and I’ve been wanting to share parts of it with you, but the audio editing process felt a bit cumbersome–since I was planning to share a few sections of his training and interject stories and explanations throughout the recording.
However, I really want to get this out to our community, so I’m going to simplify the editing and just give you most of the conversation here on the podcast. This episode will be longer than others, but I believe it’s worth your time, if you want to learn more about what’s happening in your head while you’re working to get organized.
If you look at the related links below, you can find out more about Mike’s therapy practice, and if you come into our ARISE community, there are some great handouts that go along with this training that Mike references them in the recorded discussion.
Before we jump in, I want to share the “base” information we created for Mike before this training. We wanted to begin with a partially-filled-out mood log, which is a worksheet commonly used in this specific type of therapy. We polled our ARISErs to find out which topic would be most helpful to them, and here’s that they decided:
Common Upsetting Event:
I feel exhausted at the end of the day, and my list is still long. I realize I don’t have the energy to do what I need to do.
Common Related Emotions:
- Anxiety
- Guilt
- Frustration
- Loneliness
- Embarrassment/Shame
- Anger
Related Nagative Thoughts:
- I do nothing but run around for everyone else, but they don’t show up for me (inefficiency, interrupting, not helping with housework, etc.).
- Whenever I need “downtime,” I’m neglecting my house, my family, the needs of other people, and “the list,” and I’m getting further and further behind.
- I can’t get systems in place, so I’m always in panic/”catch up” mode–and then I’m never productive.
- My life isn’t turning out the way I hoped, but I am stuck, and there is no way out.
***One funny story. When I went to schedule Mike for our ARISE call, we had a specific date booked, but then I needed to change it because our school added a professional development day I didn’t know about. I like to be “on it” when it comes to calendaring, and I was so embarrassed about having to move things around.
In my email to him, I said, “Thank you for your patience! I started feeling stressed about the scheduling issue (not wanting to cause “more emailing” for you), but I figured you, of all people, would understand my humanness!”
His reply made me laugh. He said, “No problem April. You can retain your membership in the ‘High achievers that occasionally fail at scheduling club’. I am on the board of directors but missed the last meeting due to a time zone scheduling error :)”
That was the best!
I hope you enjoy this conversation!
General Timestamps:
- [00:00:00] Introduction to the topic/podcast
- [00:05:00] How we prepared the ARISE community for Mike Christensen
- [00:08:00] What is TEAM-CBT?
- [00:10:30] An ARISE member volunteered to share experiences and work through the process live with Mike Christensen
- [01:10:00] Closing thoughts
Related Links:
Our ARISE membership – an amazing gathering place for community members that are using their Command Centrals to refine relationships, health, finances, individual purpose, and more. We focus on a new topic each month, and this is an amazing opportunity to receive coaching and support from Team LearnDoBecome. You can sign up for a free, 7-day trial here.
Feeling Good Institute (resources for finding a therapist).
Mike Christensen’s page on the Feeling Good Institute site.
Deliberate Practice of TEAM-CBT Book available for preorder.
April, thank you so much for opening this session to the whole community. Natalie, thank you for being vulnerable and sharing so authentically. I broke down in tears several times. I’m not alone with these feelings. There are powerful ways to deal with them. I can do this!
I am so happy you were able to listen! I feel so comforted by this process and by being able to give myself grace. Sending a huge hug to you as you navigate all you are managing. ❤️❤️
Thank you Natalie for opening up and letting us all listen in. Thank you April for realizing how important this “listen” would be for all of us out here. I was in tears at times as I related as well as just feeling the emotions of hearing the progress that was being made. I am formally trained as a mental health therapist (but have not practiced since before my children were born–oldest will be 19 in FEB!!) and I will say that listening to Mike Christensen brought me back…He has such an incredible empathetic voice and I can tell he really cares. Sometimes, given my training, I feel like I should “have it all together”, but listening reminded me that we ALL struggle and we ALL have the chance to get better (and wake up excited and go to bed content–my FAVORITE saying BTW). He seems amazing at what he does, and it was also incredible to hear Natalie’s insight and progress.
Thank you so much for sharing.
Love this, Erica! Such beautiful insights. ❤️ Thank you for all the good you do!
Thank you Natalie, for speaking something I feel in myself so often! Thank you April and Mike for hosting and sharing this.
I thought 2023 was going to be a year where I “put my life in order,” because a number of big time commitments have lessened for me. I’ve been feeling defeated by my “lack of progress.” This podcast, and a few others, have been important reminders to me. The work I do on my feelings and general self-care are also “progress.” I’ve been ignoring many of them, and now they are shouting for my attention. My progress this year might not end up looking like a perfectly organized house – it might look like a new ability to engage with my own feelings, to start measuring my worth in healthier ways. This podcast gave me a really powerful new way to have conversations with my feelings — so, thank you!
Emily, there is SO much wisdom in your comment! I especially loved when you said, “The work I do on my feelings and general self-care are also ‘progress’.”
That is exactly what I have been noticing! For example, I read the book “10x is Easier than 2x,” and while most of the examples center around business or “tangible” goals, I realized that this year, I am 10x happier and healthier than last year. I am so much more gentle with myself, and I am making decisions that really work for my family. Some of my other “metrics” are down, but I just don’t think they are worth the price I was paying for them.
Thank you for being such a great example! Sending a huge hug! ❤️
I’m pretty sure Natalie and I are living the same life. When she described her Monday, I had to stop what I was doing (unpacking my room because you are all such great company) to cry because someone was FINALLY telling my story and going to talk about how they got help. Thank you, Natalie, so much for being open for all of us. Thank you, April and LDB, for sharing Mike with us. I will be scheduling time to work through the tools for myself in the very near future.
I am a STEP member and I have learned so much from this program. Whenever I am struggling with overwhelm I listen to the podcast episodes as I am doing chores. THIS episode was a SPECIAL GIFT to me from my Higher Power (or at least that is how it felt to me). I have been aware for some time that it’s my feelings about my feelings that trip me up. It feels like layers of reactions that just spiral out of control, and then on top of having to get out of the overwhelm, I have to get out of the emotional spiral as well. It’s awful.
The tools in this podcast are such a revelation. I have used CBT therapy but a piece was missing. These exercises are so inspiring! I can’t wait to learn and study more! Thank you, thank you THANK YOU!
Thank you for sharing how much this episode meant to you, Nancy! It was powerful for me, as well! We are so grateful to have you here with us at LearnDoBecome and send our love as you continue to move forward. xoxo