[PODCAST 278]: “If I Try to Get Organized, That’s One More Way I’m Failing.”

I want to start off today’s podcast with a sweet message we received from Joann:

I recently had plans to help a friend of mine to get organized with our system here at LearnDoBecome (Steps to Everyday Productivity), but for one reason or another, our appointment kept getting pushed back. Finally, we got to the bottom of WHY, and it was essentially this:

“If I Try to Get Organized, That’s One More Way I’m Failing.”

It turns out that there was a lot of stress going on–with a variety of projects–and trying to tackle the disorganization became one more thing. After thinking through this specific friend’s situation, I realized that you might find yourself in the exact same spot, so I wanted to share with you what I shared with my friend–with the hopes that you will give yourself a lot of grace and begin taking the steps that are right for you at this point in your organization journey.

(1) Any feelings we have of discouragement, anxiety, hopelessness, guilt, sadness, anger, etc. represent what is amazing about us.

And I know that sounds strange, and I know I keep repeating myself as I champion the work of Dr. David Burns, but this is key.

A couple of examples:

You work really hard on a new project, a new business, a volunteer effort, or something that feels very important and exciting to you, but it seems to fall flat. You feel sad, angry, inferior, discouraged, etc. Those feelings represent how much you care about that effort. They represent your high standards, your understanding that one person can make a difference, and the fact that you care about something or someone outside yourself.
You have children or family members who are struggling, and you feel angry about the situation, anxious about the future, and guilty for not knowing in advance how to protect those people. Your feelings represent your compassion, selflessness, and willingness to put your own needs aside for someone else.

I could go on all day, but the point is that we want to be in good mental states when we sit down to organize our lives, and often, these kinds of feelings get in the way.

I’m not going to “solve” all of that in this podcast, but I do recommend the “Feeling Great” app, and I want to tell you what it’s going to do.

It will take you through a process that identifies your feelings and the thoughts causing you to feel that way, and then you’ll do a positive reframe. In essence, we don’t want to let go of any of our negative feelings because then we believe we’ll let go of all the positive things those feelings represent. Instead, we want to dial down the negatives so we keep enough to honor our situation, but not so much to disturb our progress and cause us to feel so overwhelmed.

I just want you to know that if you’re not feeling great about things right now, there’s nothing wrong with you. But there are ways to move forward.

(2) The way we define “getting organized” here at LearnDoBecome is probably different than what you are imagining.

You’re probably imagining a perfect house, perfect planning tools, alphabetized/color-coordinated everything, etc. But what we want is to have clarity about the humanly-possible list of things that need to be on your plate right now and clarity about what can wait. We also want you to know how to move forward simply with what IS on your plate without procrastination or overwhelm.

Clarity takes some effort, but the process isn’t overwhelming.

(3) Your outcome vision might be super simple right now, and that is totally okay!

I was going to sit down with a friend one time to go through plans for an organization she is running. She has been incredibly successful, she’s doing great work, and there are tons of expansion opportunities.

But guess what? All of the expansion opportunities were causing a LOT of stress. Subconsciously, she didn’t even want to optimize and organize because that would mean a lot more work and a lot more responsibility, and that didn’t feel great to her.

So instead, we talked about how the outcome might simply be to calm her mind and pare things down to the bare essentials for a while, so she could grow slowly instead of “going big or going home.”

That is a perfectly valid goal!

I personally had to do that back in 2020, when LearnDoBecome basically doubled during Covid, and there were more opportunities than felt healthy to pursue.

The book Beyond Entrepreneurship by Jim Collins and Bill Lazier also has an excellent section about how some entrepreneurs don’t want a huge business. There isn’t a “wrong business size,” as long as it is meeting the goals of sustaining your family and providing value to others.

And the podcast I recorded recently about values-centered productivity tackles this same subject. The reason I organize my day is so I can be flexible with my self care, the needs of my family, and with what I refer to as my personal ministry.

Last night, for example, I had planned to do more work because our family had been out most of the day. But my son was navigating a few things and wanted to talk, and then his friend came over and we all got talking in the kitchen, and it was one of those moments I didn’t want to miss just to “get on the computer and do more work.” But I could relax and enjoy being with my Eric, our son, and his friend because my lists were organized, and I knew what I wasn’t doing.

Closing:

If getting organized feels like “one more way you will fail,” then I think it’s time to get to the bottom of what the real issue is.

Are you expecting too much of yourself right now?

Are there some distortions in your thinking?

Are you trying to do a thousand things at the same time and wondering why nothing is coming together?

Perhaps do you need clarity on what, exactly, deserves your focus during this season of life?